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Sunday, August 15, 2010


Our Mother was someone with a heart so pure. She never spoke anything other than good, be it about things or people. She was an example of what it
means to serve people around without expectations that sets her a league apart from ordinary people. I am sure that her soul has rested in peace, but her loss is irrepariable for all of us.

Her life had many challenges, but she faced all of them with great will power and brought up all five of us with discipline, love, and affection. When it was time for her to sit and relax, she was affected by Alzheimer's disease (memory loss). She was diagnosed of this disease in 2007, but by then her disease had progressed to 50%. Probably, it would have started two years prior to this diagnosis. From 2005, I remember that she used to look confused and sometimes lost. As we did not know anything about this disease, we did not take it that seriously. In 2007, we realized that there is something wrong with my mother when she could not orient herself to time and place and that is when we took her to a Neurologist in
Bangalore. The answers that she gave to the doctor came as a shock to us, because she could not relate many things though she still remembered some. She was given some medicines for slow progression of the disease. We took her to home not really knowing how this disease will change her entire quality of life. At the next stage she could not take bath and eat without anyone's assistance, but she realized that there is something seriously wrong with her and used to cry for her plight. She used to continuously sing all the old songs and my mom was a very good singer. She was assisted by our father in all her day to day activities right from brushing her teeth, taking her to the toilet and giving her bath and feeding her. She started behaving like a small child who would depend on others for everything. At the next stage she became a little hyperactive and always keep walking in the house and many times has had hurt herself by hitting herself or falling down. That is when we started giving her sleeping tablets as per doctor's advice, but it was of little help and worsened her condition and at one stage we stopped her sleeping doses and allowed her to walk as she liked. In the next stage she developed complications in passing motion and urine and struggled a lot because of this. At this point she could not relate how many children she had though she would get excited when she sees all of us. She slowly started losing her speech and her left side got paralyzed and she always used to keep her hand straight with one eye closed, occasionally opening them. We started taking care of her with the help of a caregiver, who used to take care of her completely. We even tried physiotherapy to ensure that her body does not become stiff. We also tried Ayurvedic treatment, but it could not improve her condition, except for the fact that her bowel movements were under control. We changed her diet completely as she was a diabetic and she used to be very fond of eating and used to open her
mouth like a little child and it was a great delight to feed her. Slowly she stopped talking and used to lift her eyebrows when we call her amma or tap her feet to show her reaction. Everything was going on fine like this though we did not know what was going on in her mind. Suddenly, two months ago her food intake started reducing and she preferred to have liquid diet as she could not swallow the food. We got her admitted in the hospital, but doctors advised that nothing could be done as she has started developing multi-organ failure due to this disease. They asked us to take her home and to give her a peaceful death. We tried our maximum to reduce her suffering, but on August 12, 2010, after having a glass of milk, she got aspirated and started struggling to breathe. We supported her with home oxygen, but at 12.10 she breathed her last breath..........

Our mother is an example of what a disease like Alzheimer could do to such an active person. We almost lost her 4 years back itself, but her physical presence was making a lot of difference to us. One way we are happy that her physical suffering has come to an end, but we still wonder why she had to undergo all these sufferings and only God has the answer for this. May her soul rest in peace. Amma, we really miss you and nobody can fill that void.